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Raje Parat Yaa

मावळ्यांनो, कसा येऊ मी परत!
कुणी मला म्हणतो शिवराय
तर कुणी म्हणतो शिवबा,
कुणी मला म्हणतो छत्रपति
तर कुणी म्हणतो मराठा,
पण सर्वांची एकच हाक असते....
राजे........परत या,
राजे........परत या. 
***************
कुणी म्हणतो मी शिवबाचा मावळा
तर कुणी म्हणतो, कट्टर शिवभक्त,
पण सर्वांची एकच हाक असते.....
राजे........परत या,
राजे........परत या.
***************
कुणी म्हणतो,
जय भवानी, जय शिवाजी
तर कुणी म्हणतो,
जय जिजाऊ, जय शिवराय.
पण सर्वांची एकच हाक असते.....
राजे.......परत या,
राजे.......परत या.
******************
कुणी म्हणतो, हिन्दवी स्वराज्य रक्षक,
तर कुणी म्हणतो स्त्री सम्मान रक्षक.
पण सर्वांची एकच हाक असते.....
राजे.......परत या,
राजे.......परत या.
********************
अरे, कशाला येऊ मी???
तुमचा नामर्दपणा पहायला???
*********************
माझ्या राज्यात
स्त्री जातीचा सम्मान राखला जात होता.....
येथे तर रोजच "खैरलांजी" घडतात.......
माझ्या राज्यात
पराक्रमाला बक्षिसे मिळायची....
येथे तर रोजच "दाभोळकर" अन्
"पानसरेंच्या" मर्डरी होतात....
**************************
चालविण्याशी राज्य कारभार
सुरतेवर मारीले छापे अनेक.....
निर्माण करण्या शत्रूवर वचक
जिंकिले गड-किल्ले अनेक.....
************************
रक्षण करण्या स्वराज्याचे
उभारले आरमार सागरी.....
कसे नाही कळले तुम्हासी,
कसाब बसला ना उरावरी.....
************************
अरे, परत नका म्हणू तुम्ही मला....
राजे......परत या,
राजे......परत या......
अरे, कशाला येऊ मी परत???
तुमचा नामर्दपणा पहायला???
************************
जर खरंच तुम्ही असाल माझे खरे मावळे....
जर खरंच तुम्ही असाल खरे शिवभक्त....
तर......
आदर्श, सिंचन, कॅम्पा-कोला सारखे
"महाघोटाळे" होत असताना षंढासारखे
स्वस्थ बसू नका,,,,
स्वत:ला माझे मावळे म्हणविता ना?????
मग तानाजी मालुसरे, संताजी घोरपडे,
धनाजी जाधव, जीवा महालांसारखे व्हा.
माझी मराठी भूमी संकटात आहे,
माझं स्वराज्य संकटात आहे,
आया-बहिणींची अब्रू वाचवा.......अन्
महाराष्ट्राचे नाव सातासमुद्रपार दूमदूमु द्या...
*********************************
अरे, पावणे चारशे वर्षे झाली जाउनी मज,,,
आता तरी स्वराज्याची जवाबदारी घ्या,,,,
अन् माझा स्वाभिमानी मावळा व्हा!
पुन्हा नका म्हणू, राजे....परत या.
अरे, मी तर आहे ना तुमच्याच...नसानसांत,,,, 
विश्वास नाही का!!!! 
मग बोला कि,,,,,,,
हर हर महादेव.......
लेखक :एक शिव भक्त 
तुमचे आमचे नाते काय 
जय जीजाऊ जय शिवराय
.....


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A couple gets married. Forty years later, they re in the same hotel room they spent their honeymoon in. She takes off her clothes, lies down on the bed, spreads her legs ... and he starts to cry. She says, What s the matter? He says, Forty years ago, I couldn t wait to eat it, and now it looks like it can t wait to eat ME!

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A recently deceased man stands at the pearly gates. St. Peter tells him that he cannot go to heaven right away because he cheated on his income taxes. The only way he might get into heaven would be to sleep with a stupid, ugly woman for the next five years and enjoy it. He decides that this is a small price to pay for an eternity in heaven. So off he goes with this woman, pretending to be happy. As he walks along, he sees his friend up ahead with an even uglier woman. When he asks what s going on, the friend replies, I cheated on my income taxes and scammed the government out of a lot of money. They both shake their heads in understanding and figure that they might as well hang out together to help pass the time. Now the two friends and their two ugly women are walking along minding their own business when they see someone who looks like their old friend. This man is with an absolutely gorgeous supermodel. Stunned, they approach the man and discover that it is indeed their friend. They ask him how come he s with this unbelievable goddess, while they re stuck with these god-awful women. He replies, I have no idea, but I m definitely not complaining. This has been absolutely the best time imaginable, and I have five years of the best sex any man could hope for to look forward to. There is only one thing that I can t seem to understand. Every time we finish having sex, she rolls over and murmurs to herself, Damn income taxes!



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